Potty training. Two words that send shivers down a mom’s back. It sounds simple to the unsuspecting fool. Little do they know…
Potty training isn’t about pulling the diapers off and buying a potty seat. There’s so much more involved. The whole psychology of it is quite dynamic. And no, I do not care what your mother told you. You were not potty trained before you turned one. Unless you have photographic evidence and a log of all your bathroom trips then it is a lie.
And so, since there isn’t a clear-cut potty training methodology, I would like to share with you what I’ve been able to figure out after somewhat potty training two monsters and hearing about other moms’ stories.
Please keep in mind that I like to surround myself by regular moms. Not the super moms who claim that their child was reading by the age of two and potty trained themselves before they could walk.
1. When to start: There is no right answer to this. It all depends on when your little is ready. L Boogie was ready at 25 months. Z Money was good to go at 22 months. What does ready mean? Basically you introduce the concept and see how receptive your monster is. Can they tell you they need to go? It might even be by signals if your little isn’t using words yet. My L eloquently told me at 23 months that she wanted to poop in her diaper for now. Z ripped her diaper off and pointed at the toilet while making a farting noise. All kids are different.
If you feel like the idea seems cool to them, take it to step two. If you feel like they don’t want to or that they aren’t ready yet, then drop it completely. Put the potty training away for a week then give it another go. Don’t put too much pressure on the kid. They have enough going on in their little heads as it is. And if preschool or a relative is pressuring you to potty train just nod and smile. This is your child. Not theirs.
Another very important aspect is how stable your life is at the moment. If you’re planning on moving, traveling, changing schools, expecting a new child anytime within the next two months, forget about potty training for now. Children thrive on security and routine. No need to add their frustration to your stress.
2. What now? This is the fun part for the both of you. Take your monster on a potty shopping spree. Let them pick their brand spanking new potty. Two if there are two floors in your home. Maybe even go crazy and buy one for grandma’s house. I’ve always been a fan of the potty seat that you just put on your regular toilet. I don’t know, but the idea of having to clean out a potty filled with kid droppings was never appealing to me. I thought that was why we got them out of diapers in the first place?
So once you have your potty, you’re off to the underwear section for the real shopping… whether they’re into Barney or Hello Kitty, go wild! You can never have enough underwear or socks. Ever.
3. Now that you’re ready to go, there are a few wardrobe adjustments that you’re going to have to make. Crocs are your new best friend and zippers are your worst enemy. You have about 30 seconds between when your monster tells you they need to pee and when they actually start to pee. So you need to always be close by and the monkey needs to be in the easiest clothes to pull off. This is great for girls in the summer, they can go commando under a dress. Boys can wear loose shorts.
Why the Crocs, you ask? Because if they do have an accident, it will get all over their shoes and you can just rinse the Crocs under some running water and you’re good to go.
The instant your child wakes up, try to get them onto the potty pronto. Don’t wait til they call for you. This is usually the easiest way to get them to pee in the potty the first time. Let them see what they did. Make a big deal. Yes, balloons and confetti are in order. Let them flush the toilet. Do a little dance. This is a great way to really build their confidence and pretty soon they’ll be asking your guests to check out their dumps.
Don’t let your little spend too much time on the potty. They either need to go or they don’t. You don’t want to spend the rest of your days squatting in front of them begging them to tinkle.
After that, dress your monster in easy to take off clothing and keep tabs on the time. I usually ask every 30 minutes if they’d like to go to the bathroom (always with a big and inviting smile on my face) and I take them even if they say no every 45 minutes. Eventually you’ll figure out the timing and they realize how gross it is to pee without a diaper on.
This can take anywhere from 1-5 days. That’s completely normal, again, no pressure. If you just keep missing it and it isn’t working, put the diapers back on and try again in a week. Do not make them feel bad or guilty. You don’t want to associate those feelings with potty training or you’ll be in for a wild ride.
Now some people put their kids in pull-ups instead of underwear for the first few days, but I don’t really think that’s a good idea. I’ve always been a rip-the-band-aid-off kind of girl. But again, if that’s what works for you, then do that.
4. What about night time? That my dear mamas is a tough one. This has nothing to do with how psychologically ready your kid is, but more to do with their bladder. Basically you can leave your child in a nighttime diaper until they are four and that is normal. The best indication of whether or not your child is ready to be diaper free is if they wake up with a dry diaper two weeks in a row with no accidents.
If that isn’t the case then you should try restricting liquid consumption before bedtime.
Here’s a nice trick I’ve picked up: Put a mattress protector sheet on your mattress, then a fitted sheet, then another mattress protector and one more fitted sheet. That way, if your child does have an accident in the middle of the night, rather than swearing your way to the linen cabinet furiously, you can just rip off the dirty sheet and mattress protector on the top layer. And voila, you still have a clean and dry sheet on the mattress.
Take it easy mamas. Don’t let anyone pressure you into anything. You’ll know when your child is ready better than anyone else. They will eventually learn to use the potty, so you might as well make it a fun experience!
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