Long-distance relationships is perhaps one of those topics that has been exhausted.
From articles giving people tips and tricks over how to handle long-distance relationships to guidebooks on how to handle your long-distance lover, and finally, to articles outlining all the ways in which long-distance relationships are awful and emotionally exhausting; everything has been covered.
What I do find missing in this plethora of literature, however, is something about the actual pros of having or being in a long-distance relationship. I mean, surely, like everything in life has its advantages, and disadvantages, so do long-distance relationships; and here are three of my personal favorite things about being in a long-distance relationship.
You get your space…
Although the pressure to talk and/or text is doubled so as to compensate for the physical distance, the physical distance will give you the space to be who you are.
Whether you like it or not, physical separation will teach to not be as dependent on your partner, when it comes to plans, outings, and/or having someone just to keep you company.
This is an especially true fact if there is a large enough time difference; the fact that you will be asleep, while your partner is awake and vice-versa will inevitably mean that you master the artful balance of retaining your independence, whilst maintaining a relationship.
Mastering this art is something that will benefit you. Whether or not you are someone who enjoys this independence, it can never hurt you to learn how to resist the temptation to dependent on your partner for everything once you are in a relationship.
You learn to plan your communication…
Because physical distance separates lovers, lovers must learn how to communicate better. They learn the importance of planning to spend time together among their separate and busy schedules, and the time difference.
Indeed, the fact that there is a time difference and that life is happening to each person will inevitably mean that making the relationship work will require a cognizant, planned, and deliberate effort to communicate efficiently and effectively.
This, I think, is a skill that regular couples do not come to learn as quickly simply because they take for granted the fact that they can simply pick up the phone and talk to their significant other, or ask to see her/him.
You learn to think twice…
This is something that I have personally and strongly experienced; we are fighting and we think we are on the verge of breaking up, we think we are just a bad couple, and we think the world is ending, but soon enough one of us says “we have invested too much in this relationship to end it”, and we both reign it in.
This conscientious feeling of having invested largely comes from the extra effort we both placed in order to maintain a long-distance relationship.
Also, the fact that you have already kind of experienced times of physical separation, means that you can likely imagine how much a break-up and a complete separation would hurt.
This creates necessary brakes it forces you to think twice before jumping to anger-based decisions.
All this leads to a metaphor I heard once that has stuck with me about relationships. Think of your relationship as a project. The project that you invest a 5,000 Egyptian pounds in is going to be much less valuable to you than one where you have invested 10,000 Egyptian pounds in; this means that you would likely think much more when deciding to drop the second project, more so than the first.
And because -in my personal experience and opinion- long distance relationships push you to go that extra mile to maintain your relationship in order to mitigate the negative effects of physical separation. The easy way out is often not going to be your first resort.
