If there is one thing worse than an arranged marriage meeting, it is the list of criteria on which you get harshly judged. You are literally being checked out from head to toe while being asked the most absurd questions. Your morals are being tested and, worst of all, this is only applicable to women.
It is infuriating when a female is labeled as “marriage material”, especially when it is based on the most stupid concepts… This is the Egyptian marriage-worthy check list:
Your curfew is 9:30pm
Who would want to marry a woman who gets back home after 10pm? Apparently, no one. A girl who gets home late must be on the loose with no values. It could never be the traffic, an errand or work, it must be because she comes from an immoral family.
You don’t ride cars with boys
What is it with cars and slutty girls? A guy would rather see her in a microbus than getting a lift from her school mate because if she gets in a car with a boy, that can only mean one thing: a makeout session.
You are a doctor or an engineer (shatra)
No doubt an A student will make the perfect wife, she is a smart nerd with no life experience. FYI: Nerds can be the whores you are trying your best to avoid. They do everything the regular girl does, only some of them are not in the spotlight like the popular ones, so actions go unnoticed.
You don’t have ex-boyfriends
He wants to be the first guy you ever go out with alone, because an ex-lover means comparison, a stab at his ego and, of course, you must have been kissed – or even worse. Most girls are aware of this and claim they have never been in a relationship, but get this: Most are liars.
You don’t swear
He will test you in one of two ways: Either he swears in front of you, waiting for a reaction, or he will fake a heart attack and ask you what the hell you were thinking when you have a slip of tongue and say your first “fashkh”.
You easily submit and 7ader is your favorite word
He wants the girl who never says no, the obedient, easily-controlled and manipulated lover – because a girl with character is too much work and negotiation. It would have been fun if he was Christian Grey, but he is not and feminism is the new black.
You don’t know what a shisha is
The classic Egyptian man would be horrified if his partner smokes, not because of the whole lung damage and early death thing, but because she must be a whore who sleeps around.
You don’t travel alone with friends
Friends going on trips alone without parents’ supervision must only mean drugs, alcohol and an untamable future wife.
Your parents are not divorced
This is the most obnoxious way a girl could ever be judged. Instead of believing that she doesn’t take marriage for granted as she has seen what a divorce does to a family, you’d rather perceive her as a female whose parents’ divorce would leave her with issues no man can handle.
In reality, she is more emotionally mature than the girl who has never been through a hardship like the separation of her parents. She knows what it would take to ruin a marriage and how to make it work.
Kalbooza, beeda w sha3rek tewil
Enough said.
WE SAID THIS: Don’t miss “9 Reasons Why You Should Marry A Divorced Woman”.
